Wednesday, January 09, 2008

The Secret Life of Walter Knitty

My knitting projects literally leap from the pages of magazines and websites onto my needles via my very rich inner fantasy life. I tend to fall in love with a project because I fall in love with the story it's telling. Of course certain companies (Rowan for example) tend to execute this "life-style marketing" rather well and I get sucked in every time. Here are a few of the stories my projects told me once upon a time.


Hi there - I'm Cromarty from RYC Classic Winter. If you make me your life will be filled with leisurely days and you'll have loads of time to bond with your inner child. See, here you are making a snow man. In fact, you even had time to knit a scarf and hat for the snow man...out of Patons.

Reality: Ironically, I've not found time to cast on for this one but the Soft Tweed I got on sale sits on my dresser...because I haven't found time to put it away.


Hey, I'm Cobblestone from the amazing Fall 2007 issue of IK. I'm glad you're home. I've just finished chopping wood for the fire. Dinner is ready and the kids are in bed. I'd love to hear ALL about your day.

Reality: Well, turns out that Cobblestone had a few issues he didn't reveal until about 3 weeks into the relationship. Warning: If you make this, use a smaller needle on the bottom garter stitch band otherwise it will flare out like a little dress. Cobblestone has been frogged back to square one and started again. Shout out of thanks to Hope and Vanessa for the intervention between me and Cobblestone.

If you make me you'll look so hot that you too can wear a bowler hat, woolly socks and stand knock-kneed holding a bunch of balloons and still look great (and dammit, she does look great). Hey wait a minute - is that Stacy and Clinton headed this way?

Reality: Actually, Evie's not giving me too much grief and the RYC soft is divine. The pattern is one of those "do what you did on the other side but in reverse" sort of formats so it's been a slower start. We're ready to put the pockets in. I do love Kim Hargreaves' designs.

Indian Summer:

Ah, I can give you endless sunny days wandering along the beach. If you make me, I'll put you in touch with your inner artist. The colour, the style, the fingering yarn on tiny needles! Actually, I'm standing like this because, well, you know Rowan patterns. If I hold my arms at my side, the cuffs will scrape along the sand.

Reality: Meet my oldest UFO. I did the first sleeve and had to rip back because the two rows of red are very close in colour and I had switched them by mistake. Are bat-winged sleeves even remotely in style now?



theresa said...

I love this post - hilarious! That baby outfit is lovely.

Shirley said...

That's so funny. I have trouble sometimes seeing past the colour instead of looking at the item itself. Usually if it is green or brown my eyes glaze over!

Dr. Steph said...

That cobblestone guy is saying something else to me. Probably what Brad Pitt said to Gena Davis in Thelma and Louise.

And Cromarty is purty.